2019 MN State Fair New Foods Preview Part 3

Well lookee lookee lookee. Another day, another post about the New Foods at the MN State Fair!

You can find Part 1 and Part 2 here. We're right in the midst of things now!

Let's do this!

Sarah

I don’t know why but I really love the name of this one.

Oh, fuck it’s got buffalo chicken. God dammit. God damn everything. I hate buffalo sauce. HATE IT. 


via GIPHY

I cannot fucking even stand the smell, let alone the taste. And now I’m going to have to eat this and it’s going to ruin my otherwise baller day. Also, it’s upsetting because I love bleu cheese and I would love to try something topped with bleu cheese fondue. Not to mention BBQ chips which are sometimes the best chips evah!

Pickled jalapenos are gross though. And I’m not a fan of tomaters.

So really this is something that could maybe be great if you took most of it and changed it into something different.

Oh, RC’s BBQ. This is the place that replaced Famous Dave’s and generally hasn’t been as good.

My opinion doesn’t change

Patrick

I do not care much for blue cheese.  I understand that for some, it is a classic pairing to go with buffalo chicken.  Me personally, I prefer ranch as the superior pairing.  That said, I understand why it is on this dish, but it still puts a serious red flag out for me.  Otherwise, this might sound like a good item.  I love buffalo chicken and combining that with BBQ chips sounds interesting.  Basically, kind of a buffalo BBQ nachos?  Hopefully this blue cheese fondue isn’t terribly overpowering.  I wonder which Sarah hates more; buffalo sauce, or Mexican spices.  I miss back when this place was Famous Daves.  They really knew how to put out some fun, delicious new BBQ items each year, but RC BBQ just seems played out and uninspired.  I don’t know.

Anne

Well RC’s BBQ, you managed to hit a trifecta of making us not want this thing. Sarah hates buffalo chicken, Packie doesn’t like blue cheese, and I (and Sarah) don’t like jalapenos. I can’t wait to have to try this!

Also, you know those chips are going be so soggy.

Sarah

So, more wings. Chicken this time instead of duck, but I guess because the BBQ sauce has Irish whiskey that makes them special?

Eh. Not impressed. I mean, I lurve me some wings, even if they’re boneless so not real wings, and I’m sure I’ll like these just fine. I just, I don’t go to the fair to get wings, you know? I can hit up BWW for that.

Okay, this one HAS to be O’Gara’s now, right?

Yup.

So, there’s a decent chance these wings, which should be perfectly fine, will be garbage.

Patrick

O’Gara’s is a solid C establishment.  They never make anything that really excites or surprises.  It’s just pretty basic.  Ya basic, O’Gara’s.  Basic bitch.  Anywho, this looks fine, I guess.  I like boneless wings, and BBQ sauce, sure.  Bet it is perfectly standard for a BBQ boneless chicken wing.  Because O’Gara’s doesn’t do exciting.  It just do.  Cuz...ya basic.

Anne

*siiiiiiiigggggghhhh* O’Gara’s, can you just not? I mean, these look fine, but so does all of your food and at best they’re just fine. You never wow, and you often out right fail. Can you just give us a break?

I do appreciate that you’ve been doing a lot more GF stuff recently, so thanks for that, I guess.

Sarah

Okay, so maybe the theme is actually BBQ sauce? Because we have a lot of BBQ sauced items this year, too.

Surprisingly no one has put a blueberry BBQ sauce on a taco yet. That would just be prime theme.

I should get paid for this shit.

ANYWAY. Yeah okay, this looks fine to me. I love a grilled cheese Sammy (another sammich proving that Sarah is a fucking liar in regards to sammies) and I like meat and BBQ, and onion jam.

Cheddar is not my favorite cheese to put ON things. I like it better for snacking.

Oh, shit it has Pepper Jack cheese on it. Anne has a raging hate lather for Pepper Jack for no real good reason so she gonna be piiiiiised.

RC’s again. I’m not sure we needed two items from them this year but nevertheless it is what we got.

Patrick

RC BBQ?  You again?  The hell is this?  Ok now, hold up.  This…this looks better than that Hot Hen nonsense.  Some kind of BBQ grilled cheese sammich?  Onion jam?  Shut up!  Ok RC, this is your chance to shine.  Lemme just smack that basket of hot hen nonsense out of your other hand…*SMACK*…there we go.  Yeah, this looks much better.  I’mma enjoy trying this, I tell you what.  No, leave that hot mess on the floor.  We’re talking about Jamm’in Brisket Grilled Cheese now.  Yeah, you’re the star of this show.  Ain’t no stupid blue cheese on you.  You played it smart.

Anne

Woah, woah, woah. RC’s BBQ, I do not think you are a good enough food stand to rate 2 new foods this year. Getting a little big for your britches here.

Honestly, the pic kind of looks a little gross. And god I hate pepper jack cheese. AND HOT BBQ SAUCE? Thanks for giving us no options for the heat level. You know you’re in MN, right?

Also, why the apostrophe in the middle of Jamm’in?

Sarah

Is this some sort of bloody Mary knock off?

Okay yeah, I guess so. But instead of liquor and stuff it’s coffee and stuff. GF too, so is it from French Meadow Bakery?

Oh no! It’s Brim again! Okay welly welly welly! I am officially intrigued by Brim.

And I think I can get down with this. I don’t like coffee per se, but I do like coffee flavored things, so maybe this slushy with all its stuff will make it good!

Or maybe it will just be a lot of junk on top of coffee. Guess we’ll find out!

Patrick

…I think I got some of that hot hen on my shoes.  I mean I can smell it.  That nasty blue cheese smell, it’s just…

Oh, uh, Joey Mary!  That’s uh…*ruffles through papers*…Ok, we got another confection from Brim here.  An iced coffee slushie?  I’m not sure how I feel about a coffee slushie.  I do like food accessories coming with my drinks though.  What the hell, I’ll try it.  I could always use more caffeine at the fair to keep me out of my food coma.  Why is it called a Joey Mary?  Is this supposed to be some play off of a bloody mary?  Really?  I mean, it’s got the stick with food accessories, but the comparison stops there.  Whatever, you do you Brim.

Anne

Wtf is this thing? Oh, hello Brim. You must be a Gluten Free food stand? At least both of your new foods are.

I think this suffers from a lack of beautiful food photography. Apparently, it’s a slushie, but it looks like a watery beer. Is that pink thing the cookie? Why doesn’t it look like a cookie instead of a pink blob of dough? Are you trying too hard here, Brim?

Also, I assume this is a play on a Bloody Mary, but I don’t get the replacement of Bloody with Joey. Can someone explain? OH, I GET IT. Joey as in a cup of Joe.

Sarah

What? I mean, okay, this looks fine but how is this fair food? It’s just a steak made out of lamb?  Like, I can get lamb whenever. There’s nothing fancy about this. Just lamb, I guess.

Though, I do like Holy Land. Their Gyro on a stick is, more or less, just a slab of meat on a stick and it’s great, so maybe this will be too.

Patrick

No, I know I smell the blue cheese, I’m not crazy.  What?  I didn’t smack him, I smacked the Hot Hen out of his hand, I was making a point.  I…I don’t see why we need to get the authorities involved.  Uh, look over there!

…HOLY LAND!  That place makes a great gyro on stick, or a gyro platter which is just a tray of fucking gyro meat.  Don’t tell me you’ve never just wanted to shove a bunch of gyro meat in your craw and ignore all that pita and onion business.  Lamb is one of my favorite meats that I don’t get to partake in often, and now here Holy Land is offering me two big ole lam loins?  Yes please!  Sometimes you just need some meat with no strings attached.  I’ve got a good feeling about this.

Ok, we need to beat feet over to Farmer’s Union, I hear sirens.

Anne

Sure- looks tasty. Doesn’t seem super special but I’ll eat it all I’m sure.

Sarah

Just…. *sigh* why is it pink if it’s lavender lemonade? WTF? That’s a missed got-damned opportunity.

Also, okay, lemonade, I guess. Whoop-de-doo.

Oh, and it’s at the Farmer’s Union. Why is this even on this list, guys?

Patrick

Boy, getting real creative now, Farmers Union.  Lavender?  In your pink lemonade?  Can you even do that?  Well, it can’t be any worse than barf-o-nade (that’s honey lemonade for any of you new folks here).

Ok, that’ll do.  No, I’m not cutting corners, I’ve got nothing else to say about it, it’s boring lemonade.  Shut up and follow me through the food building, it’ll be more crowed – I mean faster.  I’m not running, it’s called speed walking and we’ve still got a lot of food to cover.

Anne

*sigh* OK whatever. I mean, it’s just lemonade. And Farmers Union tends to be pretty pricey. I am slightly irritated.

STOP GIVING SUB-PAR VENDORS MULTIPLE NEW FOODS, MNSF!

Sarah

Looks like this is also the year I will be drinking coffee. Add one more and it could be fighting along the others as a possible theme.

THEME FIGHT! THEME FIGHT!!!

So okay, a latte with mini donut flavoring, pretty much. I understand WHY this is a fair food, I’m just not sure I agree with it.

I don’t know that we’ve ever tried anything at the Anchor Coffee house, though, so that will be nice.

Patrick

I don’t try many fancy lattes, mostly because too much sugar is bad for me, but I would like to think I would enjoy them?  A mini donut flavored latte sounds particularly fun and I hope it is as good as I imagine in my mind.  More caffeine is good too, keeping me alert and on my toes.  Not that I need to be alert, it’s just a happy day at the fairgrounds, telling people their food is shit or great, and definitely not striking anyone as some liars would want you to believe.

Anne

Well I’m not a coffee drinker, but at least this is a latte. If I’m going to drink coffee this seems like something I would want to try. But how’s that mini donut though? I bet it’s shitty like most mini donuts are.

Ok, let’s get back to some more fun, crazy offerings please…

Sarah

Hmmm, okay. I don’t quite get the name because yeah, it rhymes, but like, bologna isn’t usually on coneys, right? So, it doesn’t work for me.

Pistachio sausage though, sure! I am obviously very upset about the fucking pepper blend but that bun looks grade A amazing and I’m willing to give that muffuletta olive and pepper salad the old Sarah try.

Mancini’s is not bad, too. Though it’s not always great, either, so prolly this will be about the same.

Patrick

I do love a nice dog, and it is always fun trying different varieties and combinations.  Pistachio’s in a sausage?  Why not.  I love some peppers on my dog too, but I’m sure the twins will complain about that.  Oh wait, the peppers are blend inside the sausage.  Whatever, shut up.  The bun looks good and crispy too and that muffuletta olive and pepper salad topping looks…oh wait, there is peppers on top.  Alright, just gotta read to the end first before commenting.  This looks good, not gonna lie.  I don’t lie about food, no sir.  Not like some.

Anne

…ok but not like this.

Ok, I am interested in tasting the pistachio sausage, but that is it. There are WAAAAAAAAY too many peppers on this thing for my taste.  Also, muffuletta is a type of bread and sammich, so how is it a type of olive salad here? What is going on?!

 That bread looks tasty though. Let’s just scrape off everything and eat the sausage and bread.

Okay! That's it for today. Only two more days of posts, and then the REAL countdown begins!

2019 MN State Fair New Foods Preview Part 2

All right!

Onto the second part of the breakdown of the new fair foods!

You can find Part 1 Here.

Onto our thoughts!

Sarah

Okay, I really love Cubanos (yeah Sarah is all like “I don’t like sammiches” but then she’s also like “here are some of my favorite sammiches.” I’m a fickle bitch, what can I say?)

So, what makes this a fusion I guess is that instead of the delicious bread of a Cubano there’s a flour tortilla instead? And it’s more fajita-y pork?

I dunno. I mean, I think it will be fine but switching out the bread for the tortilla does not a better experience make, in my book.

Presumably this is from Juanita’s Fajita’s since it’s her signature mustard. Yup.

Though, why does a fajita place have a signature mustard? That’s a little strange, right?

Patrick

Hey!  Juanita’s Fajitas!  I’ve always wanted to try her food, and now I get a chance.  Holy crap, is that some kind of Cuban-style fajita?  I, uh…this is embarrassing, I only read the description and just now saw the name.  That is definitely what it is.  That’s like, literally the name.  I loooove a good Cubano sammich, and THIS looks like an amazing variation on the original idea.  I’ve got a great feeling about this, yes I do.  Right into my mouth with you.

Anne

At first, I was an.ger.y at the slab of green pepper in the bad boy, but then I found out it was pickle and I am ok again. So basically, this is like a Cuban sammich (yum), but they’ve ruined it by stuffing it in a flour tortilla. Looks like at least it’s been fried/pressed so that might help. I’m expecting this to be fine. Also, where exactly is the fusion? Is it just the tortilla?

Sarah

The fuck is this?

First off, wouldn’t it be easier to stuff a bratwurst with pickle instead of the other way around? I don’t even understand HOW one stuffs a pickle. There’s no…there’s no hole or anything to fill. It’s not an olive.

So, it’s pretty much a bratwurst corn dog but also it has pickle in it.

Okay. Hmm. I’m not sure. I think it might work. As long as the pickle isn’t too juicy so it makes the batter soggy. I wonder what kind of batter we’re talking about. I hope it’s sweet.

Also, I was really excited it had dipping sauces but upon a second look at the photo I realize it’s just fuckin ketchup and mustard that they put in little cups because they think we’re some sort of jerks who wouldn’t notice.

No way in hell are they giving us little cups for ketchup and mustard. Stop trying to look so fancy, guys. You stuffed meat in a pickle. Just own that shit.

Swine and spuds. Sometimes they make pretty good stuff. Sometimes it’s a bit of a letdown. This could go either way. It’ll probably end up being “okay, not great.”

Patrick

I, uh…what?  Like, how is it….what?  Hold on, pump the brakes.  How the eff do you stuff a pickle with bratwurst?  Shouldn’t that be “a bratwurst stuffed with pickle?”  That’s gotta be a typo, right?  Swine & Spuds, you need to get it together.  This is just…I don’t know what to think about this.  I mean, I guess it should be good?  It’s basically a bratwurst corn dog plus pickle, right?  And, you dip it in ketchup or mustard?  Is dipping pickle into either of those weird?  I mean, they are both on a burger, so not really.  I just…I just can’t with this.  Alright, hand it over, I guess we’re trying this.  Jeez.

Anne

Well I find the name delightful- just makes me happy. I like that this is not bratwurst stuffed with pickle, oh no. They’ve gone and flipped it on us by stuffing the bratwurst into the pickle! Can you imagine??!!

I think it’s always hard competing with State Fair Corn Dogs, so even if this is the best damn Dilly Dog I have ever tasted, I won’t ever get it again because I already am married to Poncho Dog Corn Dogs.

Sarah

Anne’s going to lose her shit because she frickin loves to eat the quackers.

Oh, this is from Giggles! Giggles is (generally) our absolute favorite place at the fair. But last year was a rare miss. And actually, it was a miss because of another duck item.

Giggles seems to be trying to make duck happen.

That makes me just a touch nervous. But also, this is just fricking wings so how hard can they be?

Also, also, though, this is just wings, so I’m not overly impressed.

Still, I like wings so I’m sure these will be just fine. I’m interested to try the dipping sauce.

Patrick

Howdy Giggles, my good old friend.  Last year was a bit of a rare miss, but I’m hoping this year you hit us with a great comeback.  Will duck drummies be the dish that does it?  Maybe?  I really do enjoy a good battered wing and dipping it in sauce.  Seems like a simple food, but usually Giggles comes through with some great flavors, so I’m hoping this really packs a tasty punch.  Either way, Giggles is a staple with lots of great food, so I’m happy to visit either way.

Anne

As soon as I saw it was duck, I knew it would be at Giggles’. I am very happy to try this- how have I never had duck drummies before? I love duck and I love Giggles’ (though they’ve had an off year or two recently), so I am excite.

Why is the tequila lime dipping sauce red? That is not a color I associate with tequila OR lime.

Sarah

Okay, this is obvs from Dino’s since they mention it in the description. Umm, hmm. So, it’s kind of like a Greek cream cheese wonton? I think I could get down with that. I’m not a huge fan of feta so I’m glad to see its dryness is cut with something like cream cheese.

Though I will say the reason I like cream cheese wontons is because you dip it into a sweet sauce, so the fact that this is served with olive tapenade, something saltier, makes me wonder if it will be too much.

But nevertheless, I guess I am intrigued by this, though I suspect it won’t blow my mind or anything.

Patrick

Sarah isn’t a big fan of feta, I think, so I’m betting she’s poo-pooing this on her review.  I really like that Dino has branched out the last few years with some new items, and I feel they have been pretty successful in years past.  I think these feta bites sound like pretty good, but I think it’s going to be that dipping sauce that makes or breaks this snack.  I enjoy olive tapenade, so I’m hopeful this will be enjoyable.

Anne

Hmmm…I am not sure about this one. It’s like a Greek Cheese Wonton. But Feta is a tough cheese- it’s so damn dry. Also, I like olives, but I’m not sure as a dipping tapenade. I’m doing a shifty side-eye at this one…

Sarah

Okay that’s a third taco new food. I’m calling it as the official new foods theme this year. Motherfuckin Tacos!

Bleeeeeeergh. I want to like this so much. I love the idea of a deep-fried taco, and I love guac. But I’m not a chorizo fan, and black beans are right out. So, I’m pretty sure I’m going to one bite of these, love the texture, but kind of want to cry because of the flavors.

Maybe these will be a big hit and they’ll roll out other taco flavors in the future so then I can partake.

Oh wait, it’s Taco Cat. Which, now that I think about it, doy. But Taco Cat is one of those rotating food vendors that only stick around for a few years before switching out, which means there go my dreams.

Also, the rotating vendors are almost always a disappointment.

Patrick

Taco Cat carries on the tradition of making something that looks good, but usually tastes mediocre or has some fatal flaw.  Last year it was a tasty general Tsao chicken taco that lacked sauce.  This year, its stuffed, fried tacos on a stick.  The green chorizo one sounds good, but the vegetarian one sounds kind of boring.  The stick on this thing just seems pointless.  The first thing you’re going to do is pull that out and eat them like you would regular tacos.  Just get rid of the stick.  Not everything HAS to be on a stick, people!  I’m calling this now, it’s not gonna get above a C grade if that.  Yeah, yeah Sarah, we get it, you hate Mexican food.  God, settle down.

Anne

 Last year Taco Cat gave us the General Tso Chicken taco (I believe- fact check this) and it was good (but needed more sauce and was expensive). So, I’m glad to see they’re back this year.

But damn Sarah gonna be piiiiiiissssed about these tacos.

I am most excited for the bean and corn one, and I like how crispy these fried shells look. But it’s always so hard/sad to have one final new food at the tail end of the bunch- we’ll all be done caring by the time this food makes an appearance.

Sarah

Ummm. Okay? I guess? I don’t really know what to think about this. I assume it’s from O’Gara’s because it’s, like, the only place trying to serve up Irish fare (and generally failing.) 

You know what? I can get behind this, assuming it’s good. I like a good soda bread, and Cinnamon nut butter is good and so are blueberries.

Wait. Is the theme this year actually blueberries???

Because the pie competition was blueberries too…

Oh, fuck this actually ISN’T from O’Gara’s! Well color me an asshole. Is Brim a new place? The name doesn’t sound familiar. If it is new, then I’m actually pretty excited for this.

Patrick

Well hello there Brim and welcome to the fair.  Up at the North End too?  Great, it’s nice to have more eat spots up there and spread some of this food out across all that acreage.  This-looks-great!  I don’t know what about it excites me so, but I’m hella excited.  Maybe it’s the cinnamon nut butter, or the crispy grilled bread.  I’ve never had Irish soda bread grilled like that before, but I’m excited to shove this in my face.  Please be great.  I need you to be great.  I need it!

Anne

Well well well. Who are you, Brim? You’re in the North End, so I’m assuming a brand-new restaurant as part of their ongoing efforts to bring crowds out that way.

This looks cute. A 3^rd blueberry offering- that’s tying tacos right now for the theme this year. I wonder what kind of nut butter it is. I’m always glad to see GF offerings for my GF friends, so thanks Brim! I wonder what kind of food stand you are. Sammich shop? GF shop? I am excited to meet you.

Sarah

This looks like someone trying to cash in on the amazing thing we had last year that was all cotton candy and ice cream and cereal that shouldn’t have been good but really, really was.

Unless it’s from the same place? Then it would be less cashing in and more just doing what they do best.

Okay it IS the same place. Which makes me think this will probably be a hit!

And I like ice cream and candy toppings and cotton candy so I am excited to shove this sweet sweet confection right in ma mouth.

Patrick

Hahahaha, ok ok ok ok, prepare for a bi-polar post here.  Ahem…

What the fuck Rainbow Ice Cream?  This is LITERALLY the same shit as last year.  You just didn’t roll it up this time.  So, you made the same thing, but got lazier with the production.  Different ice cream flavor, I guess, but otherwise, all the same damn components as before.  Well, there’s a gummy bear in there, I guess, but still.  Got some real balls calling this a “new” food item.

OHMYGOD I WANT IT!  Rainbow cloud roll was fucking delicious last year.  I said it would be dump and just for kids, but it’s not.  It’s like a dessert unicorn!  Mystical, magical, and sweet.  Blue raspberry soft serve?  Sure!  Gummy bears thrown into the mix?  Fucking gummy bears!  Throw whatever crazy shit you want on this, you know what you’re doing!  You are a sweet confections genius!  Your only fault is I can see that shit-dump Speakeasy Hideaway from your doorstep.  Those asshats, amiright?  Yeah, you get it.  Fuck their trifle too.  You’re my best friend Rainbow.  You get me.  Haahahahah, ooooh Rainbow.

Anne

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! FUCKIN YES!

I assume this is the same shop that brought us my fave Rainbow Cloud Roll last year (just changed their name to Rainbow Ice Cream so we can understand that they’re more than just the Cloud Roll).

Well of course I can’t wait to try this, and I know it’s going to be bananas awesome because they knocked it out of the park last year.

The only thing I’m a little sad about is now I have 2 delicious cotton candy/ice cream concoctions to choose from, and that looks like it’s going to be a hard choice

And that's it for today! Check us out tomorrow for Part 3!

2019 MN State Fair New Foods Preview Part 1

WOOO!! It's the best time of the year!

New Foods at the MN State Fair time!

Okay fair. The actual Fair is better. But still. We are excited!

35 new foods this year so we'll be breaking these foods into five separate posts. Which means there's no time to lose!

OH!! But before we get to that, we have a new Instagram account!

Find us at FairFestFeasts.  We will be posting live, as tasted photos of us when we're at the actual fair. It's the best place to see what's down as it's happening.

All right! Food thoughts time!

Sarah

Overall thoughts:

Well here we are! The best time of the year!

In general, I think I’m pretty happy with this list. There’s nothing that I’m, like, SUPER excited about, but there’s also not a ton that I’m really dreading.

I expect this will be a perfectly fine year. Which, okay. Sometimes it’s good to have those so you can eat all your favs from years past.

Theme this year is either Tacos or Blueberries. I actually think it’s Blueberries since that was the pie contest for the baking this year, too.

So yeah.

Thing I’m Most Excited For:  Breakfast Potato skin, I think. Even if it has garbage peppers on it. And then maybe the Shrimp and Grits fritters.

Thing I just Don’t Want to Eat:  The Hot Hen, even though I just absolutely love its name.

Patrick

Well, here we are again.  The excitement is building for the coming fair, and we are getting a taste of what is to come with the new foods list.  Last year I was rather cynical in my prospects due to 2017 having been a serious dud for new foods and losing some favorites from years past to the annals of history.  However, 2018 had turned out to be, frankly, a stellar year.  The new foods came back hard and came back strong with some real positive notes.  I’m hoping this isn’t a pattern and this year is a downslope between good years, but as usual, I will try to remain optimistic where I can and stubbornly harsh where I can’t.  If I was to label any theme or pattern this year, I’d put it as “Desserts and Drinks”, as almost half of the new list falls into that category.  Hopefully we can keep things balanced with a good portion of savory to sweet items.  We’re back up to thirty-one new items (maybe a little more with there being a few with a variety of options), so let’s hope this doesn’t completely wreck my wallet.

Most Excited For:  There’s a lot to choose from this year, but the first to really jump out at me is the Turkish Pizza at the Blue Mon Dine-In Theater.  I have always wanted to try Turkish pizza, and much like other such items in the past, the State Fair has deigned to give me the opportunity to live out that dream.  That Grilled Sota Sandwich from new vendor Brim also has me curious, and I’m hoping it is as tasty as it looks.

Least Excited For:  I gotta say, I’m surprised that nothing really stood out as something horrendous that I’d have to endure trying.  Usually there is...something that’s either a food I already know I despise or something that just looks awful on sight of description, but I think I’d have no complaints about trying really any of these new items.  But this is the “least excited for” section, so I think I can pick one item out of the list.  That item is gonna be Snow Cap Mini Waffle Sundae from Hamline Church Dining Hall.  They are pretty well known for standard (read boring) fare and this looks as unimaginative and unoriginal as they come.  Waffle with ice cream and syrup.  Really raising the bar there folks.  That’s sarcasm.

Anne

I scrolled through the list real fast just to glance at pics, and looks like it’s a Taco year? Also, there’s maybe some sort of hypodermic food injection? Let’s read on.

Ok, there are like 3 taco offerings and 3 blueberry offerings, so I’d say they’re tied for the ‘theme’ this summer.

This list is pretty good this year! There are enough crazy things to keep me excited. I feel like there might be too many beverage offerings (oh- there’s 3 of those too. Maybe it’s the year of the drink). In general, I’m not ever going to be really excited about a beverage, because it’s just a drink, so it has to be really crazy and they never are. I mean, one of them is just a regular old lemonade for crap’ sake.

31 new foods- the same number as 2017, 4 more than last year. Excellent. (of course- 3 of them are bevs, so maybe not as great as I thought)

Most Excited For: Tough call this year. I keep waffling between the Halo Cone and the Wingwalker Donut Flight. But man, I could make some arguments for those grit fritters and Savory Funnel Cake, or that Pebbles and Bam Bam Nordic Waffle.

Halo Cone. Lock it in.

Least Excited For: Snow Cap Mini Waffle Sundae, or the Stuffed Cabbage Roll. Boo I say!

Sarah

Hmm. I’m torn on this one. I’m not a big ham or salami sammich fan. I mean, let’s get serious: I’m not a sammich fan at all. But. BUT. This has melted mozzarella, and basil. And I love that shit.

And. AND. This is from the Sandwich Stop, which I think is that one little stand that makes amazing, killer sammiches and everything we’ve ever tried there has been amazing.

So, I guess that means I’m tentatively hopeful for this.

Though I’m not sure how I feel about that balsamic vinaigrette dressing. Guess we’ll see!

Patrick

Oh man, the Sandwich Stop makes some fine sammys, I tell you what.  This new sandwich begins and ends with the warm flatbread for me.  That looks real nice, but the actual sandwich itself doesn’t exactly entice me.  Who knows though, it could be killer.  I do love some melted mozzarella and fresh basil.  I’ll keep my mind open, but reserve judgement until I’m giving this a try.  Love the name, though.  Ay, oh, get a look at this sammich!  (that was said in a bad Italian accent, in case you were wondering.)

Anne

*I see we are still forgoing the oxford comma, MNSF*

Ok so the Sandwich Shop makes some good shit but looking at this pic I am underwhelmed right off the bat. I know this list is alphabetical, but is it too much to ask to have something like Rainbow Cloud Roll to really kick this list off to a good start? Anyway, the description sounds better than it looks, though I prefer my salami hard. I’m sure this will be a perfectly fine sammich, but c’mon- it’s the mutherfuckin State Fair, and we’re not here for ‘perfectly fine sammich’. Remember how you had the Bacon Fluffernutter sammich back in ‘17, and how it was crazy and amazing? More of that please.

Sarah

Yeah all right! I’m down for this. I mean, Key Lime isn’t like my favorite pie, but I’m fine with it. And Anne has been making a ton of blueberry pies in preparation for submitting one to the State Fair so I’m on a pretty big blueberry pie high right now, so smash those berries into a lime pie and I think I’m gonna like it.

Farmer’s Union Coffee Shop you say? Hmm. Is that the place that had the nitro brew? But also, the crappy éclair with the kernza flour?

If so, I am a little more worried about this.

Patrick

This is another location I find tends to make for boring food items.  Sometimes they may appear at a glance to be something clever, but they are just gussied up crap.  Key Lime pie doesn’t really even make my top five pie list, and adding blueberry sounds interesting, but not by much.  Plus, I’m pretty sure that picture is exactly as it comes, and I’m telling you now, it needs more whipped cream.  I’m betting this lets us down, just like it did last year, and probably years prior.

Anne

Bold choice to do blueberry, when the Pie competition this year is blueberry and I am all blueberried out. Why aren’t you thinking about ME, Famers Union? Also, why is it not Farmer’s Union? Shouldn’t it be possessive? Also, why is Key capitalized and not lime in the above description?

Ok, onto food opinions. Meh. I mean, it might be tasty (though considering the source, that’s questionable), and I like a blueberry and lime combo, but I appreciate that in the past Farmers Union has done some more interesting things like with Kernza flour (granted- they’ve mostly failed, but at least they TRIED). This seems like just a regular pie.

Sarah

As soon as I saw wine in the description I was like “I bet this is from MN Wine Country”

But! BUT! I was actually wrong! It’s from the Hideaway Speakeasy.

But that just boils down to the same thing: this shit is going to be so fucking expensive it’ll probably put us into a rage lather that we won’t be able to calm down from.

And because it’s the Hideaway there’s a 50% chance it will be just absolute garbage.

So, normally I’d be like “yeah, I like me a parfait, or at least the idea of a parfait” but now I’m not sure. It seems a bit too fancy and frou. But. I do like lemon curd. And whipped cream. And compotes (though rhubarb isn’t my favorite) and I sure as hell want that vanilla pound cake. So, it’s just going to come down to whether it all works together, and whether that wine just mulches everything together into a mush.

Also, the motherfucking cost.

Patrick

I want to imagine that this dessert is in a big giant vase the size of my head, but let’s get real.  This is the Hideaway Speakeasy; the same place that brought you a racist sandwich they had to change the name of, and insane prices of underwhelming food.  I’m betting this trifle comes in a shot-glass, and is priced at (drum roll)…$21?  That’s my prediction folks.  If anyone else was making this, I’d say that sounds like an elegant and exciting dessert option.  Hey, it might actually taste pretty good (it has been known to happen), but at whatever ludicrous price point they’re letting this go at, it just won’t matter.  I love cheese curds, but if they raised the price to $50 a pop, even I would question how deep my love goes for fried curds.  And, just because I can’t express my loathing for this establishment enough, I’ll remind you again that they made a racist sandwich their first year.  Did you know sandwiches can be racist?  The Speakeasy knew but didn’t realize that was a bad thing.  Or maybe they did.  They changed it after, you know, people complained.  Because it was racist.  Plus, it was super expensive, so just like an added middle finger to the whole ordeal.

Anne

Legit was like ‘who the fuck is Barb’ before I realized it was shortened rhubarb, and holy shit this is at the Hideaway Speakeasy. I was kind of into it until my stomach dropped out of my anus when I read who was offering this. Goddamn you know they’re going to charge $20 for this thing- they used words like coulis and compote. Also, of all the alcohols, I am really not a wine fine (despite best efforts). Also, for all reports, The Hideaway doesn’t even do their fun signature drinks well, so why would they combine their two crappy skills into one thing?

Also, is it a blueberry year?

I swear they better not have more than 1 food on this list this year…

Sarah

Before I even read the description, I was like “I need this. Right now.”

God, I love potatoes. And I LOVE potato skins. And breakfast is just an excellent meal.

Oh shit it’s deep fried?? Oh fuck, peppers? Why people always throwing in peppers to things like that makes it better. It doesn’t. Peppers don’t belong on things. They’re gross. This might be ruined now.

What’s chislic? This is the MN STATE FAIR, not the SD one. Okay so it looks like it’s just cubed meet. Usually mutton or lamb, but also venison. This is beef. I’m down with red meat in cube form so that sounds great. Especially because it’s blackened.

Ohhhhh bearnaise sauce?? Yessssss. Pour that shit over everything.

Where the hell is this found?

Blue Barn. Hmmmm. Okay, so last year Blue Barn knocked it out of the park for me. Enough that I forgave them all their previous missteps. So, if I actually forgave them, then I got to believe that this will also be the delicious thing I want and deserve.

Patrick

Blue barn really stepped it up last year.  Their new item was perfectly fine, but we also tried their…I wanna say some kind of bacon tots?  It was damn good, whatever it was.  So, I’m not gonna go off on my usual tirade about Blue Barn’s over-the-top food items that never really pan out.  Could that happen again this year?  Sure.  I do love a good fried potato skin, though, and a breakfast version with some kind of blackened beef (the hell is chislic?) sounds like an interesting take on the typical bar food.  Wait a minute, though…béarnaise sauce?  That’s not…never mind, I thought that was the same sauce they put on eggs benedict.  It is not, which is good, because Packie no-likey hollandaise.  I’m sure the twins will scoff at the crotch peppers on this, but I don’t mind.  Peppers have started to grow on me, even the crotch variety, so I’m hoping this is something that will go good with those tots.  Keep at it Blue, you can do it.

Anne

I bet Sarah is reaaaaaalll excited for this. And honestly this looks great! Though I wish it didn’t have peppers.

What the hell is chislic? Apparently, it’s a ‘traditional dish of cubed red meat most commonly localized to the state of South Dakota. Traditionally made from mutton or lamb, but has also been associated with wild game, deer and venison mostly, and even cubed beef steak depending on preparation’.

Also, the word chislic is possibly derived from a Turkish work rooted in shish kebab.

So basically South Dakota made Shish Kebab and just made up their own word and called it traditional.

Last year Blue Barn really redeemed themselves for us after years of subpar results. I hope we’re continuing on their new 2018 angle and that this is good. I will give them the benefit of the doubt. Though I wish they’d been more adventurous and used lamb or venison instead of beef.

Sarah

Oh shit yeah! Okay, I know I don’t like Mexican food. But guys, listen. I wish I liked Mexican food, okay? I love the idea of tacos. I just don’t like the Mexican flavor profile. Or beans.

So, when there are tacos that are not Mexican tacos, I am alllll over it.

So, this? Yeah, I am excite about this. Deep fried cone taco is just amazing and I hope it’s crunchy and great. Sesame garlic ginger sauce sounds great.

It’s just going to come down to whether that queso fresco or carnitas flavor profile overwhelms the other stuff.

Oh, also I’m not a huge fan of sour cream but I’m sure Anne will like that addition.

This is from San Felipe Tacos. I’m not sure we’ve ever had anything from there, so I guess we’ll see how it goes!

Patrick

Carnitas is one of my favorite taco/burrito fillings, and the sauce on this sounds killer.  Basically, a cone-shaped carnitas taco, but with enough flair to make it exciting.  I’m hoping this is good, because it would be just my kind of food that I’d really enjoy.  I think maybe even Sarah might like this, as it doesn’t sound like your typical Mexican seasonings that she thinks are of the devil. 

Anne

At first glance I thought this was a gyro. Also does it come with that convenient holding stick? I hope so.

My preferred tacos are on a hard shell (god I despise soft tortillas) so I appreciate that this has been deep fried. Also, the flavors look like they might be safe for Sarah to consume. Looks tasty.

Sarah

More tacos!

Is…is Taco the emerging theme for this year?

Flour tortillas are not my choice of tortillas but it is what it is. I like me some smoked brisket and love me some gouda. Though hopefully it’s not too smoky flavored. I have mixed opinions on Kale and Brussels Sprouts, mostly that I’m not a fan except for in a few occasions.

The BBQ sauce could make or break this taco, both in regards to flavor, and if there’s too much or not enough.

Shanghaied Henry’s? That’s . . . this seems like a strange offering from them. Though we don’t eat from them that often so maybe they generally do do (heh) a lot of tacos or BBQ.

Patrick

Not sure I’ve ever been here.  As a general rule, I prefer my tacos the traditional way (whether hard shell with ground beef, or more traditional street taco style), and I think there is the dumb obsession with trying to meld tacos with BBQ.  Nothing about this sound particularly bad or off-putting, but I thi9nk it has been done a hundred times.  Kind of boring, not terribly inventive.  Maybe it’ll be good BBQ or sauce.

Anne

Already with a soft tortilla shell. BOO I SAY. This seems really roughage heavy and light on the protein. I am not a Brussels sprouts fan, but maybe they’ll be hidden by all the cabbage.

This looks like a regular fancy taco. I would not normally spend money on something like this. What do we do with those chips? Just eat them naked?

Also, lmfao at this line “a pickled kale crunch made with kale”. Uh, yeah- NO DOY

Sarah

Okay. This is…this is something.

First cheese: good.

Sriracha: bad

Funnel cake: good

Savory funnel cake: unsure.

Oh okay. The sriracha is just an aioli dipping sauce. Okay okay okay. That makes me a little more interested in this. Oh shit, there’s also ranch or butter dipping sauces? Can we get all three? I hope so. I don’t want to limit my dipping sauce options. Dipping sauces are the best.

I’m not sure how I feel about mixing allllll these cheeses. And again, the savory funnel cake could go either way, but I think I’m mostly intrigued by this. Though I don’t want my cheddar like in the picture for this: slightly warmed shreds. It better be fuckin melted.

At least it’s from a Funnel Cake stand so at least they (presumably) know what they’re doing in regards to the funneling of cakes.

Patrick

I’m glad the Sriracha is actually in the dipping sauce, but even so, this seems a tad bizarre, or crazy perhaps?  I feel like funnel cake is the kind of dessert/dough that if you add things to it, it just ruins what its original intended purpose was.  To be light, fluffy, and just a little crispy.  Add cheese into the mix, and what will it due to that delicate balance?  I don’t know, and I guess we will see.  Maybe this will be really good, a cheesy funnel cake.  I’ve been surprised by stranger things (not the show, just things in general).  Flipping this from a traditional sweet dessert into a savory snack could be a fun treat.

Anne

Heh- now we’re talking. I have not had a savory funnel cake before, so I am intrigued by this offering. It looks tasty, and I’m glad that the Sriracha is confined to the dipping sauce (though didn’t they get the memo that Sriracha at the fair was 4 years ago?). I would also very much like to try it with the ranch and garlic butter, but this seems like it’s going to be an either/or situation, and we need to try it in the way that Funnel Cakes intended- with dumb ‘ol Sriracha.

Tune in tomorrow for Part 2!