2024 State Fair New Foods Preview Part 2- Cookie Butter Crunch Mini Donuts through Grilled Purple Sticky Rice

Part 2! Let's see what absolute delights await us 

Cookie Butter Crunch Mini Donuts by Mini Donuts & Cheese Curds

Vanilla-flavored mini donuts coated with vanilla sugar, topped with Biscoff cookie butter drizzle and cookie crumbles, and served in a bucket rimmed with cookie butter and cookie crumbles.

Sarah

I sighed audibly when I saw this.

Listen. I don’t want any more fancy or different mini-donuts, okay? Just stop. They’re never as good as the real deal. Also you always force us to get a whole fucking bucket of them when I just want 1. 

Also, the bucket is rimmed with cookie butter and cookie crumbles. What the fuck am I supposed to do with that? This isn’t a margarita where I’d get a little taste every time I take a sip. Let’s take the mechanism that you’re supposed to use to hold your donuts and make it sticky. Yeah, that sounds like a fucking awesome idea. Thank god they’re right by a bathroom so I can wash my hands.

I’m willing to bet that that cookie drizzle will make those donuts soggy quicker than you’d think they would.

This just feels like a sugar overload. I doubt there’s going to be any balance to it at all. I definitely predict we will each try the one we have to, and then throw the rest away. 

Jesus, these put me in a bad mood.

Packie

Haah.  Aaah hahhahahaha!  This is just hilarious.  Last year this place put out a mini donuts drizzled in frosting and sprinkles with birthday cake mini donuts and we were all like “Pffft, look at this mess, it looks like it is for children needing a sugar rush.  I bet it is awful”.  And holy shit, they were great, a solid B at least.  So here we are again this year with a similar situation, only THIS time I am not so jaded and bitter. Not here at least. I love Biscoff cookies and though I think this is going to be a sweet sugar high, I am absolutely looking forward to punishing my sweet tooth with this one.  And they fucking coated the bucket rim like it is some giant cocktail?  Are…are you going to lick the rim?  I’m doing it. I’m gonna do it.

Anne

Ok so remember last year when we (and I quote) said:

“I don’t know- I looked at this and was already annoyed”- Sarah. “This just sounds kind of dumb”- Packie. “Calling it- this is going to fail and be a D”- Anne, about fancy mini donuts and then promptly ate our words (and all those dang mini donuts) because the birthday cake donuts were the bomb?

Well once again I'm like I don't need fancy mini donuts. Crap I barely need mini donuts at all, and Peachey’s is right around the corner with the best regular donuts.

Anyway. 

Ooooh Biscoff- those cookies are so damn good omg hahahahahahahah they rimmed the bucket!!! Pinkies up everyone, this is some fancy shit. Are we… are we supposed to lick the rim of the bucket? Or like take a donut out of the bucket with our mouth? What is the intention here except for a goddamn mess?

I’m sure these will be fine.

Cotton Candy Iced Tea by Loon Lake Iced Tea

Brewed butterfly pea flower tea sweetened with natural flavor and cane sugar. Garnished with a swirl of edible glitter and a rock candy swizzle stick to stir for a color-changing effect. (Gluten-Free, Caffeine-Free, Vegan) (New Vendor)

Sarah

Oooh what do we have here?? I LOVE a sweetened iced tea! Oh this is pea flower tea. So, is it actually tea then? Or just pea flower blossoms? Sometimes pea flowers make my tummy hurt so now I’m a little worried. 

Okay so it’s sweetened with sugar, and then edible glitter is added to make it pretty.

What about this is cotton candy?

Cotton candy isn’t glittery. Nor does it change color. Are they just using the name cotton candy to make it sound more fun? That’s dumb.

I am happy about the rock candy stick, though. Why didn’t they just name this like Glitter Crystal Iced Tea? Truth in advertising and all that.

Loon Lake Iced Tea? Wait, is this a new place? Or has there always been an iced tea vendor at the fair that I never knew about?

I have so many questions.

But, as drinks go, I’m tentatively excited about this. I’m sure Packie is a bit bummed, though. He does not like the tea (though if there’s no actual tea and it’s really an iced tisane, he’ll be much happier.)

Packie

Ooh, new vendor baby.  I’m always pro new food items being drinks, because honestly it gives us a bit of a break and saves some stomach space.  When it comes to iced tea drinks, I kind of straddle the fence. Not a big fan of just regular iced tea, but I have enjoyed some that are combined with other flavors. This particular concoction looks fun and sweet, and I love that you get a rock candy swizzle stir stick with it. Pretty excited to give this one a try.

Anne

WOAH WOAH WOAH. I LOVE BOTH OF THESE THINGS.

Also- who is Loon Lake Iced Tea? Is this a new vendor?? It better be because if there’s been an Iced Tea vendor at the fair that I didn’t know about well what the actual fuck.

Ok wait

…where is the cotton candy in this?

What kind of false advertising is this shit?? Pea flower, cane sugar, rock candy, edible glitter. NONE OF THIS IS COTTON CANDY

Yes they are all sugar and that’s all that cotton candy is, BUT IT’S NOT THE SAME.

I am both disappointed and still wanting to drink this.

Crab Boil Wings by Soul Bowl

Chicken wings marinated in hot sauce, grilled and then fried with corn, chicken apple sausage and potatoes. Tossed in a "crab boil" butter and finished with a lemon wedge and parsley. (Gluten-Free)

Sarah

Whoa whoa whoa. What we got going on here?

I love me some wings. And I’m a fan of a crab boil. But crab boils, by nature, are wet. And that’s not how I like my wings.

Okay let me take a closer look here and see what’s what.

God fucking dammit. The wings are marinated in hot sauce. Fuck my life. 

I DON’T WANT HOT SAUCE! Why can’t we just have good wings that have good flavors other than “spicy.” Also they’re cooked twice? Fried and then grilled? That’s…weird.

I mean, I’m not knocking it. Maybe it’s a genius idea, IDK. But I’ve never eaten anything that was fried and then grilled on top of that.

Okay so after all of that, too, then it’s tossed in melted butter. So it is “wet” wings.

Wtf. It doesn’t look like there’s any sort of breading or anything so at least they won’t get soggy but now with the double cooking I’m actually starting to worry they’ll be super dry and that’s why they’re adding the butter.

Like, here’s the other thing, too. I don’t need all that other stuff. I know you’re trying to make this a crab boil or whatever, but I don’t buy wings so then I can also eat corn on the cob and chicken apple sausage (the WORST sausage, not counting chorizo.) I’m not coming to your stand, Soul Bowl, in order to eat an entire meal, okay?

Ugh, Soul Bowl. Two years ago they had a thing that people apparently loved. But when we got it on the first day it was objectively terrible. It had clearly been sitting under a heat lamp for like an hour, and was old and gross. So now I don’t trust them, even though I want them to succeed. 

I suspect that at best this will just be fine. Though I don’t necessarily think it’ll be terrible either. Just blah.

What a bummer because these were one of the pictures I saw in my quick glance through I was pretty excited to learn more about.

Packie

Hmm, this is a peculiar one.  Soul Bowl has an odd track record for us (see the soulsicle their first year in 2022), but I’m willing to let that go as this is only their third year.  My first thought on this was “no way I want to eat boiled wings”, but then I learned that the only part of this that is a ‘crab boil’ is the butter they toss it in?  Mmkay… Ok, to be fair it has all the components of a crab boil (save for the crab, I guess), and wings marinated in hot sauce, grilled, and then fried sounds like it could be pretty tasty. I worry this could end up being a bit bland, but maybe I just need to hit up some better crab boils to reassess my opinion.  Hoping Soul Bowl can win us back with this one, but I know what rooting for them has gotten me in the past.

Anne

“Oh shit” is the words that came out of my mouth when I saw this. Looks hella good. But then I saw it was Soul Bowl and I feel like we did not like them last year (last 2 years? Idk I gotta look them up).

Ok I looked them up and they got an A for the Lemonade and a D for their Soulcicle in 2022 and a C for their Miami Mango Pickles last year.

Welp, these wings are marinated in hot sauce so boo. Grilled and THEN fried? Oooh. Crab Boil Butter? I’m listening. Though I bet this is greasy and messy to eat. Also this feels like a lot of food- practically a whole dang meal. I have to try 33 new things Soul Bowl! Calm Down.

Deep-Fried Halloumi Cheese by Holy Land Deli

Halloumi cheese, crafted from a blend of sheep and goat milk, wrapped in a pastry dough and deep-fried. Served with a side of sweet chili sauce. (Vegetarian)

Sarah

I knew right away this was going to be Holy Land. Generally Holy land does good food, but I don’t know. I’m just kind of over the whole “deep fry cheese” thing. Like, are we still trying to live up to the glory of the mozzarella stick? Haven’t we proven by now that nothing holds a candle to it, no matter how many cheeses you try?

I suspect I’ll take a bite of this and think it’s fine and then probably not want to eat anymore because I need to save my space for everything else but especially things I really like.

I also think there’s a decent chance that we could burn our mouths on these and I don’t want that.

I don’t really have much else to say about this, I guess.

TIME TO PRESS BACK

Packie

Ok, Holy Land has a pretty steady track record as a solid C student.  Ok, not great.  The comments are pretty similar across the board, with them falling a little short for some reason or another.  This year they’re offering something similar to a cream cheese wonton, though using a different cheese blend and offering a sweet chili sauce for dipping.  I think it sounds fine, and I predict this will go down about as well as much of their other offerings.  I’m like the parent who has come to expect C’s on the report card, but will get excited if they score a rare B.

Anne

This looks like a sort of cheese wonton? Is that ketchup? Looks like ketchup but that can’t be what it is.

Oh it’s a sweet chili sauce- durr.

This looks perfectly pleasant- I hope it’s tasty. But it doesn’t have a wow factor. NEXT!

Deep-Fried Ranch Dressing by LuLu’s Public House

Ranch dressing filling made with ranch seasoning, buttermilk and cream cheese in a panko shell, deep-fried and dusted with ranch powder. Served with a side of hot honey sauce crafted with Cry Baby Craig's hot sauce. (Vegetarian)

Sarah

LOLOL what the fuck??

Oh fucking shut up LuLu. I love you so much and this is so fucking amazing. This is EXACTLY the kind of food that should be in the MN State Fair. Texas would NEVER because they don’t have those Midwest vibes. MN is more “north” vibes than Midwest, but we definitely dabble.

Even just looking at this picture and I’m excited to try it. I think it’s the panko breading that does it for me. That’s 100% the right choice here. I’m not gonna dip it in the hot sauce unless someone (Anne and not Packie because sometimes his palate can’t be trusted when it comes to things like this) tell me it’s not too spicy. I’m excited about the hot honey with it, though. Seems like a good counter to the ranch.

I do think this might be a take a bite and think it’s good but not eat the rest of it, but we shall see. I’m really hoping it’s take a bite and then eat the rest really fast so you can snag another one before the other two do (unless there’s enough to have two each) but that’s all going to come down to the texture, I think.

I’m a mouthfeel person. If the mouthfeel is on point, I’m not gonna stop.

But thank you, LuLu, for being awesome as usual. We love you. You’re our favorite.

Packie

HAH!  I just love how my morning started with “I heard one of the new foods was deep-fried ranch”, and I was like “bullshit, you can’t deep-fry a liquid”.  Well, the State Fair responded with “Hold my beer”. I mean oh my god, I heard in the Texas state fair you could get deep fried butter, and here in the great state of Minnesota we were just like “Uh, that’s not what the average fat white person wants.  They throw a gallon of ranch on everything, so this is obviously where we are headed as a society”. If all of that wasn’t rich enough, the fact that this is brought to you by LuLu’s is just telling you to shut your mouth, this will be delicious. Anywhere else, I’d say this was the swan song of some mad scientist who was carted off to an asylum shortly after completing his magnum opus. But effing LuLu’s?  This will be delicious, and may possibly be what destroys America, or finally brings us all together.

Anne

Wellll daaaaaamn gurl. Lulu you crazy. Here is the item that everyone has been talking about. IDK why I didn’t think it would be coming out of Lulu’s but makes perfect sense now that I know.

Ok so also sort of cheese wonton adjacent since it’s a cream cheese filling (but panko breading rather than a wonton wrapper). And a hot honey dip! Iiiinteresting (though the hot sauce is from CRY BABY? Do you know we’re Minnesotan?)

This looks like a bananas concoction that is perfect for MN and our love of ranch. I am excited to try this one

Dill Pickle Tots by Tot Boss

Fried tater tots tossed in dill seasoning with a hint of vinegar flavor- like a dill pickle potato chip. (Vegan)

Sarah

I already think those tots are waaaaay undercooked. 

Wait, it’s Tot Boss. Okay, they know how to cook their tots so now I’m not worried about that.

Okay yeah, this sounds good. Nothing blow your mind clever, but I like me some dill and I like me some tots and I’m sure this will be great. Though I often wish things were dill flavored and not dill pickle flavored. Like, the herb is excellent, people. It can stand on its own.

IDK, there’s nothing more to say about this. Though I guess this will be our first time buying Tot Boss at the fair. This is another vendor that we supported years ago via their food truck before they graduated to the big show.

Packie

I don’t think I’ve ever visited Tot Boss at the fair, solely because I’d eaten at the food truck for years prior to them earning a spot on the fairgrounds. That’s not to say they aren’t great, and they are. Real solid tots with fun varieties that are all pretty slammin’. This new menu item seems pretty simple, but I also think it is a safe bet and is definitely trying to cash in on that last bit of pickle fever from the previous two years. I bet this is perfectly fine and I am sure I’ll like it.

Anne

Heh well welcome to the new food list Tot Boss. Really moving up in the world.

I can’t decide if it’s a good thing you skipped the dill pickle craze of 2023, or if you’re just late to the party.

I like Tot Boss, and we’ve already tried all their offerings (pre-MNSF), so it is exciting to see something new coming out of them. I’m sure this will be damn tasty too. But again- missing that wow or excitement factor. Granted- not sure how creative you can be when you just do one thing really well. But that’s for them to figure out (and then for us to enjoy or lambaste as necessary)

Fried Bee-Nana Pie by Sabino’s Pizza Pies

Handmade pie filled with Minnesota honey, fresh banana and Biscoff cookie butter; battered and deep-fried. (Vegetarian)

Sarah

Ohhh what do we have here now?

Right away I know Packie is gonna cry because while he likes banana flavor, he can’t stand the banana texture. 

Wait. I thought we were doing like banana and peanut butter. Or banana and bacon. But instead this is banana, honey, and Biscoff cookies (again??)

That’s…That’s a lot of sweet. At least with peanut butter you get the saltiness. Same with the bacon. This is just all sugar.

Where is the balance? Why don’t people understand this? This is why, when eating a deep fried candy bar, you go for the Snickers one because it has the salty peanuts to counteract the heavy sweet.

Also, does that crust look like a pancake to anyone else? Is this a stuffed pancake?

Hmm, has there always been a Sabino’s in the coliseum? I have no idea. I have no memory of it, but it seems weird that Sabino’s of all places would be new.

Well, I kinda like going in the coliseum so now we have a reason to.

I suspect we’re gonna need some water after eating this, though.

Packie

Is this a new vendor?  Doesn’t say it is, but then I wouldn’t be surprised if there are several vendors in the Coliseum I’ve never been to.  Oh wait, this is the place that had that dumb charcuterie board last year.  The one with a cracker for a board that was impossible to eat and the most basic bitch of cheese.  That’s the place.  Packie don’t do bananas!  Is this made with pie dough or pizza dough?  Who can say?  If I was a banana loving man, which I am not, this would probably be a good flavor combo with the biscoff cookie butter and some honey.  I do like that they seem to support local businesses with their meats and cheese last year and now their MN honey, but it still has to taste good, honey.  I’m gonna call this one, that it will disappoint even those of us who enjoy partaking in the mush fruit.

Anne

What the whaaaaat? What is this place? A new vendor? I saw pie and assumed Sara’s Tipsy Pies even though this didn’t look like her normal fare. This almost looks like an uncrustable sammich?

Ok honey, banana, and biscoff- sounds tasty (that’s two biscoff offerings this year so far). Sucks to be Packie probably bc he no like nana. I keep staring at that crust- what is going on there? Oh! It’s BATTERED. Hmmmmmm… does that count as a pie then? Like isn’t the hallmark of a pie is that it has pie crust? Battered feels like a pastry maybe instead? I guess I'm not sure- I can't think of any other “pies” that are battered.

Love that it’s a pizza place but instead they offered a “pie”. IS this a new vendor? Or is this a little pizza place in the coliseum that finally got itself on the list? I’ll have to do some research.

(Update here when researched- they are not a new vendor so idk)

(Update again- they were the ones that had that TERRIBLE charcuterie board last year.  It got a D)

Drilled Purple Sticky Rice by Union Hmong Kitchen

Purple sticky rice grilled over an open flame until crunchy, then topped with choice of shredded Hmong beef jerky or pickled mushrooms. Garnished with fresh herbs and finished with Union Hmong Kitchen's Krunchy Chili Aioli. (Gluten-Free, Vegetarian option)

Sarah

OOH! I LOVE purple sticky rice! It’s such a great staple any time you order Hmong food. Which means this is likely from…Yep! Union Hmong Kitchen!

Ugh, they’re so fucking great, and I’m so happy for their awesome success. And this sounds fantastic.

First off, delish purple sticky rice. Honestly, I would have been happy just with that. But now it’s grilled until it’s crunchy?? Ho ho ho! OHH and it’s topped with shredded jerky or mushrooms?? But how are we gonna decide?!

AND an aioli? The king of drizzle sauces?

This is gonna be a winner, I can just tell. I am very excited for this.

Am I the MOST excited for it? Maybe… But we’ll have to see what else is in store for us.

Packie

Oh dang, they are back! UHK had one of our favorite new foods of the year in 2023, and has been a pretty solid new addition to the International Bazaar. I know Sarah lurves her purple sticky rice, but what will she say when we grill it over hot fire for a crunchy brick with some added flavors thrown on top. Damn, how do I choose between beef jerky or pickled mushrooms?! Is the Krunchy Chili Aioli like a chili crisp made into an aioli drizzle?  Who can say, but what I can say is I am pretty chipper to give this a try.  Could be really great, so long as that rice block doesn’t get so crunchy that it is hard to eat.

Anne

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAH YESSSSSSSSSSS! UHK you continue to knock it out of the park by taking already regular amazing Hmong food and just turning it up a notch to make it fair-worthy. GRILLED RICE ON A STICK? Get out of here

Oh god HMONG BEEF JERKY TOPPING?  I want that more than the pickled mushrooms, ok guys?? OK??!

Get in my mouth

Tune in tomorrow for part 3 where we'll see Anne's reluctant top pic, and Packie's indescribable rage.