2021 MN State Fair Food Preview Part 5 (Sidecar Sandwich through Waffle Burger)

We did it! We made it to Part 5. Today we explore the food item from the most hated Fair Food Vendor, and learn that Anne is out of touch with her Harry Potter vernacular. Come along for the ride!

Sidecar Sandwich - The Hideaway Speakeasy

Thick-cut cognac-infused bacon smothered with Cointreau and citrus marmalade, layered with melted Havarti, smoked Gouda and aged cheddar, served on toasted sourdough bread and garnished with fresh orange slices.

Sarah

Every year we have to trudge up the fucking stairs to this dumb place and pay like 50 bucks for something that ends up being straight shit.

This sounds good. And I bet if it was done by another place (like that amazing sammich place across from the Turkey stand who’s name I’m drawing a blank on) I bet it would be.

But because it’s The Hideaway Speakeasy it probably won’t be good. And even if it’s okay, the price will just piss us off until we don’t like it.

I don’t make the rules.

Patrick

Seriously, eff this place. If I didn’t know any better, I’d say the owner heard the Ahiers trio have to try EVERY new fair food item each year, and they were like “let’s make a place that puts out shit food and costs a fucking fortune. Maybe we’ll even offer complimentary slaps to the face.” Just a big ol’ backhand to your stupid mug for ordering from their stand. What the hell is this monstrosity? A fucking bacon and jam cheese sandwich? Oh hey, thanks for the free orange slices on the side, that makes for a real easy treat to awkwardly suck out of the ring of orange rind while you try to hold onto this slop pile in your other hand. As per tradition (I’m hoping Sarah and Anne remember to include this), we have to guess what insulting and inflated price they assign to this shame stack. I’m going to guess $18, though I’m betting they were like “hey, let’s just bump that up to $20, people don’t want change for their crisp twenty-dollar bill! Also, I punch babies.” Yeah, $18. Oh, and also, never forget, their debut year they offered a racist sandwich that they needed to then rename. Keep it classy Spitqueasy.

Anne

I saw the pic and was like “this looks sort of…subpar? This can’t be the sammich shop,” and then saw it was The Hideaway Speakeasy and everything made sense again.

So this is a grilled cheese with bacon and orange. Jesus Hideaway, just- just stop. You’re just awful. And I know because you added things like cognac-infused bacon and Cointreau and ‘fancy’ cheeses that you’re going to charge at least $12 goddamned dollars for this thing.
At least it has to be sort of tasty right? Like how do you mess up a grilled cheese, right? RIGHT?

 

S’mores Funnel Cake - Funnel Cakes

Graham cracker funnel cake topped with marshmallow, milk chocolate chunks and more graham cracker bits.

Sarah

Oooh, all right! Last year (again, 2019) we did funnel cakes up more than we usually do, and now I have a hankering for them, so I’m excited to see one on the list.

And you can’t go wrong with s’mores (which is why we always get a s’more at the s’mores stand.)

We’ve never tried a funnel cake from this place, though. I assume they’re good? They’re in the food building which is prime real estate (Jesus I spelled that so so wrong…) so I hope so. Either way, I’m looking forward to grabbing a table, snatching one of these, and waiting for the next rendition of Sweet Caroline on the karaoke stage to make me feel like I’ve come home.

*Sniff* I love you MN State Fair.

Patrick

Who doesn’t love the ole classic funnel cake? Last time we were there, we tried a savory funnel cake and it blew our minds how good it turned out to be. Seems they are going back to sweet flavors on this one, though. I loooooove a s’more, and anything done s’more style can usually be shoved right into my face and down my gullet. However, you CAN’T just throw the components onto something and call it a good s’more. The chocolate needs to be melted, the mallow needs to be toasted and gooey, and the graham crackers, well, that is pretty much fine as is. I like this idea, but if the picture is accurate, they just sprinkle unmelted chocolate bits on top and drizzle with some kind of marshmallow cream. That’s not a s’more, that’s just what comes with a s’more thrown raw onto a funnel cake. I hope I’m wrong and this is done better than it looks. We’ll see.

Anne

Last time we had a savory funnel cake from Funnel Cake and it was surprisingly excellent. We already know sweet funnel cakes are good, and s'mores are good, so really how can they fuck this up?

Not inventive at all, but I’m sure it will be gooooood.

 

Spufull Puff - Potato Man & Sweety

Mashed sweet potatoes blended with sweetened cream cheese then wrapped in dough and fried. Lightly dusted with powdered sugar and served with maple dipping sauce on the side.

Sarah

What is this? How do I pronounce it? Does it rhyme with Hufflepuff? I think so.

Anyway, what is this delightful thing? It’s definitely eye catching. And then it’s from a potato place! I feel like we’ve gotten something from them before…

Oh wait. It was the fucking churros that were terrible. Like straight rocks.

Shit. That doesn’t give me high hopes for these because how hard is it to make a good churro? Not hard at all.

But this sounds really really really good to me. I mean, I love potatoes. They might be my most favorite thing in the whole world to eat. And there’s sweetened cream cheese? And dough? And fried? And a dipping sauce?

Jesus be still my heart.

God, I hope it’s good. I really want this to be amazing.

Please please be good.

Patrick

HAHAH, this sounds like the house dish for Hufflepuff. “I’m a Hufflepuff and I eat Spufull Puff!”  All right, joking aside, this sound incredible. It’s like an inside out sweet potato pie (which is pretty much the same thing as pumpkin pie, let’s be honest) and that is all right by me. Sweet potatoes and sweet cream cheese stuffed inside dough and fried? Maple dipping sauce? Yes! Gimme!

Anne

How do I say this? Spoo-full? Spuh-full? Spew-full?

Oh fuck it’s potatoes?? Wtfwtfwtf. Well I guess it’s probably Spuh-full, like full of spuds?
(ETA I’ve been informed that it’s probable Spufull Puff like Hufflepuff. Sorry I didn’t recognize the HP reference in a food item that has nothing to do with HP, and like 80 years after the fact. Also, at least spell it like Spufflepuff then).

Anyway. I guess the hint that it was potatoes is the fact that it’s from Potato Man and Sweety but looking at that pic that is not what I would’ve guessed AT ALL.

Ok, now that I’ve gotten over my initial shock of what I’m looking at, this sounds like it might be good? At least it’s interesting and I’ve never seen something like this before.

Have we had good food from Potato Man before?

Ope- just looked them up and it was the Sweety’s Churros in 2017 and we gave them a D. So I guess I’m a little more cautious now…

 

Summer Lakes Beverages in 3 varieties: Wedge-Hammer, Lake Storm Lemonade and Bama! Lemon Sweet Tea - Summer Lakes Beverage

The Wedge-Hammer (gf, v) is fresh ginger, orange and other citrus juices, zest, sparkling water and simple syrup. Lake Storm Lemonade (gf, v) is lavender-infused lemon and other citrus juices, zest, sparkling water and simple syrup. Bama! Lemon Sweet Tea (gf, v) is fresh brewed tea, fresh lemon and other citrus juices, zest, sparkling water and simple syrup. Debuting their mocktails at this year’s fair, Summer Lakes Beverage’s new menu also features the Bootleg (gf), Luna Paloma (gf), Fresh Press Margarita (gf, v) and Fresh Press Jalapeño Margarita (gf, v). Mixes by the bottle to make cocktails at home will also be for sale. gf (gluten-free); v (vegan)

Sarah

God that was a lot of words to read and a ton of parentheticals. They need to calm down a bit.

Is this a new place? I’ve never heard of it. It’s also weird to have a new beverage place. Oh, I see, they’re a gf and vegan drink shop.

Hm. Is that weird? I mean, it’s not hard to make drinks gf and vegan.

Shit, there’s a lot of drinks here.

All the lemonades sound great. I’ll try them all, but I’m most excited for the Bama! Lemon Sweet Tea (let’s calm down on the names too, please.)

I love a bootleg, so I’m sure we’ll try that. And if it’s good, I’m sure we’ll buy a bottle, too. Honestly, I want to try every single one of these drinks.

Patrick

Hey, a drink place. All right. Three new drinks to try, ok, let’s see what we got here. The Wedge-Hammer; fresh ginger, orange, citrus juices, zest, sparkling water, syrup. I don’t really like ginger flavored drinks, but maybe the rest of that will all balance it out. Sounds actually refreshing and sweet, so I hope the combination works. Lake Storm Lemonade – lavender lemon, citrus juices, zest, spark water, syrup. So basically, lavender flavored lemonade. Not sure about that one. Bama! Lemon Sweet Tea; fresh brewed tea, lemon, citrus juices blah blah the same stuff as the last two. Basically, an Arnold Palmer which I am not fond of either. I’m open minded and I won’t say that I wouldn’t like any of these, but there wasn’t one I was straight up enthusiastic about. But, maybe with all the additional elements, the juices, the zest, the simple syrup, all of these might hit the spot. Who knows.

Anne

Well damn! All of these sound tasty af, and since there’s 3 of us we can get 1 of each. I’m really excited to try these drinks- it seems like, with rare exceptions, new drinks are almost always some sort of fancy/crazy beer, and sometimes there’s a coffee drink thrown in. But what if you’d rather not drink and don’t like coffee? I guess this is the vendor for us! I’m excited! (as excited as I can be for a beverage.)

 

Waffle Burger - Andy's Grille

Quarter-pound bacon cheeseburger served between two maple-infused candied sweet crunch waffles with a side of maple syrup.

Sarah

I don’t know if I know this place. It could just be one of the many holes in the wall places around the fair. Like the one place where Packie gets a jank burger for like one buck just because it’s the cheapest burger at the fair simply for that reason alone. Or maybe it’s new.

I love a burger. I’m not sure how to feel about this. It feels gimmicky, which, yes, is dumb to say because it’s the state fair and everything is gimmicky. But I guess I mean it feels like they sort of tried, but maybe phoned it in? Like, hey, what if we used waffles instead of a bun? Done. I dunno.

There’s nothing about this that I don’t want, though. And I think it could be good. I’m excited to try it.

Patrick

A quarter-pound bacon cheeseburger with a waffle instead of a bun. Also some maple syrup on the side. Doesn’t seem particularly revolutionary. If the waffled is actually crunchy (like it says in the description) I think that might actually be a nice facet of this item, but it’ll have to just be a killer burger to excite me much. Seems pretty standard otherwise.

Anne

Ok. This sounds tasty, and I appreciate the syrup on the side. This doesn’t seem super exciting though, and while I haven’t had a waffle burger before I guess I’m surprised I haven’t? Just seems sort of expected I guess. Also does it looks super tiny to anyone else? Are they going to Hamline Church Dining Hall on us with the size? I know it says 1/4lb burger, but that looks like a regular slice of American Cheese on it in the pic, and the patty is engulfed by it sooooo….

So that's it! That's all of the official new foods. Now we just have to bide our time for something like 6 weeks until we can return to the 12 Days of Fun.

As a reminder you can check out all of our day-of New Food Thoughts by following us over at Instagram fairfestfeasts

See you at the Fair!